B U L L S H IIIIIII T.
This is why every single culture has a set of values that they teach their daughters and nieces and granddaughters about finding a man gives meaning to your life and it's crap. Like, freshly produced from the rear end of a cow and steaming.
"You haffi go learn to cook or yu nah find a man!"
"Girls who cyaa whine stay single."
"A princess isn't a princess without her prince."
All of this is rubbish.
Look here. I am single. Most of my friends are single. I'm pretty sure only, like, two of my friends are in committed long term relationships. And there is nothing wrong with us. (Okay, maybe there are things wrong with us. But it's not because we're single.)
Firstly, your value is not defined by what someone else values you. A Benz isn't worth fifty dollars just because that's all I have to spend on it. It's still a frigging Benz and I cannot have it just because I want it. I have to frigging be up to its standard. Girls, why can't we believe we're luxury vehicles? Right now, go listen to that Benz Punani song by (I think) Vybz Kartel and pretend he's not just talking about your vagina. Now repeat after me: "I am not an Acura with a Benz sticker. I am a Benz. And you're going to have to earn me." There you go. Some standards.
Secondly, your life does not begin when you have someone to share it with... and this belief is what is keeping you where you are. Assuming that where you are, is stuck. Your life begins when you decide to make investments in your hopes and dreams and passions for yourself. It begins when you decide to live, and this decision doesn't necessarily take place in a relationship. As a matter of fact, it should take place when you're single. When you're single, you have time to be unapologetically self-centred and narcissistic (but just a little bit). It's your time to do things for yourself. And then, when you find someone who you want to share your life with... you'll have a life to share. Taking up a life he brings to you is not sharing a life. Be able to say, I have a love for travel... would you like to see the world with me? (Or so on... whatever's your cup of tea, actually.)
Thirdly, you were born alone and will die alone. You have to learn to be by yourself sometimes. You have to love yourself, nurture yourself, take care of yourself, tolerate yourself, develop yourself and provide for yourself. For the love of God, please do not allow whatever your man brings to the table be all you two have to eat. Go and earn your slice of bread so that, God forbid, he takes the bread out of your mouth, you do not starve to death. Spend time getting a job, building a career, investing in an education, becoming better than you were before. And loving yourself while you go about all of this. It's easier to love someone else and let someone else love you, if you already know how to love yourself.
And finally, I don't know about you and what your beliefs are... but I'm a Christian who believes my God, my Holy Father... is a King. And you know who princesses are? Not the wives of princes, but the daughters of Kings! I am a princess because my father is a King.
There's nothing wrong with being in a relationship... but there is something seriously wrong with believing all your life is good for is being in a relationship. Now go, beautiful princesses, into the world to be wonderful princesses who rescue their idiot princes every now and then.
Royally yours,
me.
